With the attitudes of love and/or hate toward our fellow human beings (as ourselves, and God or Nature), we always default to either one mode or the other.
- Apathy is a passive (thoughtless or uncaring) form of hate.
- Violence is an active (aggressive or hostile) form of hate.
- Tolerance is a passive (accommodating or hospitable) form of love.
- Caring is an active (proactive or thoughtful) form of love.
For those who automatically default to 'hate' mode, very little can change their attitude. Even if they "like" or "need" someone, they continue to hate them although they might not always show it. They're likely to lie about it, even to profess love for them.
Hate is a function of dominance, manipulation, and control.
For those who automatically default to 'love' mode, again very little can change their attitude. Even if they are terrified of someone, they continue to treat them fairly anyway, only acting defensively when necessary for survival, protection, or well being of self and/or others.
Love is a function of respect and appreciation.
Even when acting defensively, those who automatically default to 'love' mode are motivated by a sense of righteousness, justice, and morality -- not by hate.
Their actions might be swift and final whenever absolutely necessary, but there is no inclination to torture, vindictiveness, revenge, or harsh punishments.
With the modes or attitudes of love and hate for the human species and for God or Nature, there is no "might", "maybe", "neither", or "both".
But then the default mode of love I just described can't be compared to individual marriage, romance, familial, social, or even national relationships or loyalties; because people can and often do become romantically or legally involved with a partner or partners -- without love ever entering the picture.
Likewise, assuming the default mode of love doesn't mean we want to become somehow involved with everyone we meet.
Likewise, someone whose default mode is to hate may intentionally involve themselves with others for reasons irrelevant to love.