So I am going through philosophical path and I think I am deep into it now days , That old question "What is the purpose of living when we are going to die one day" was eating my mind but Then I found you have to give meaning to life, Now I want to know from experts, Experienced philosophers that How one should live a life when he knows about this world and He knows everything is just random event, Nothing matter at all so :
Should I live a life what I want to do and the way I want to live? But the problem with this kind of life is I can't survive because this life demands curiosity and thinking and I do that continuously then I don't want to earn money because in my views Money is just papers created by us, Why should I invest my life after this thing? But I am enjoying my life to live this way, I am not caring about anyone, I do, I sing, I play whenever, whatever I want because there is no pre-defined meaning of life, You give a meaning.
Or should i live a balanced life , Act fake in front of corporate people so that can stay in corporate world, Fake smile so people can think you are happy and be living good life , But this life is good till when we are outside, If we are inside our home and spending time with yourself alone, You will find you are being fake.
What is the way of living then?
Since when I am into philosophy I started to see this life from the very different perspective, I think only a few people see from this perspective, it is kind of Enlightenment, After this, I have no desire for anything, Not for money, Not for any materialistic thing, No greed, No jealous , I found myself quite isolated and I started enjoying my solitude , I can stare a single leaf hours and hours and be thinking about nature and observe nature , When I am seeing anything I am finding that this is something amazing but people find it normal , If I am seeing a flower , I am amazed , happy to see how nature have shaped this flower , How many chemical reactions happed during this growth , How amazing nature is, How complex structure this flower has and I am curious about knowing the nature science behind flower , But same time if someone will see that he will say, It's just a flower nothing else , That's the difference I am finding myself little isolated , I am not enjoying their talks or anything , I am more towards curiousity But I am not able to find what is the best way of living life , Should i continue with those people who see that flower as "Just Flower" or should i go into isolation ?
Should I force myself to give an aim for life?
Or if I choose without aim life ( as there is no predefined meaning of life) then What is the purpose of living and wasting time on planet?